The Dr. came in around 7:30am and let me know he would be releasing me that morning, but that I needed to come over to his office immediately afterwards for an ultrasound. Dre came back around 8am and stayed with me the rest of the day. And although they have orders from the Dr. to turn off and unhook the Heparin and Coumadin IV's from me, I was told I have to leave the IV's in for the ultrasound. I finally got released around 10am, but I was told by my nurse that we would have to wait for transportation to come up with a wheelchair and take me over to the Dr.'s office (which is located in the Baptist East building). I suggested that I could just walk over, but she said it was hospital policy that transportation takes me over there in a wheelchair. I asked her how long it would be, she said about 5 to 10 minutes. This was a few minutes before 10am. After sitting until 10:30am with no wheelchair showing up, I walked over to the nurse's station and my nurse was surprised to see me and asked why I was still there. So she called transportation and they said they would be up ASAP. So again we wait. I kept telling my wife that we should just leave and walk over there ourselves, but she didn't want to get anyone into trouble. So we waited until 11am and still no wheelchair. We went back out to talk to the nurse who said that transportation was running behind. So the nurse just went and grabbed a wheelchair and took me over there herself. And now, my friends, I know what it's like to be pregnant, as I got to experience the fun of being smeared with some sort of jelly and having someone press a cold ultrasound instrument into my ribs...HARD to check my heart. The IV's still in my arms were never used for or during the ultrasound and FINALLY get taken out. Afterwards I was told I needed to get an appointment to get a stress test done the next Monday (Nov. 19th). And I got out of there for the day and spent the rest of the week chilling at home with the dog.
Ok, now let me explain the stress test. A normal stress test is where they have you jog on a treadmill for a period of time. That would have been fine by me, except since this was a heart problem, they didn't want me exercising and said they would be giving me a non-physical stress test. They would be giving me a PET scan and a Dobutamine or Adenosine Stress Test. I'm not sure which of these drugs they gave me, but this is how WebMD describes this kind of testing: "This test is used in people who are unable to exercise. A drug is given to make the heart respond as if the person were exercising. This way the doctor can still determine how the heart responds to stress, but no exercise is required". This is exactly how the lady who scheduled me for this test also described it. Sounds relaxing, huh. Almost fun. And if you ever are offered this kind of test, what you want to do is take a fork and jab it in your eye. Because you are better off with a fucking fork in your eye than ever going through this bullshit! So I go into the test not even the least bit concerned about it because how it was presented to me made it sound easy. So they lay me down and run me though this archway/donut type thing, which is the PET scan machine. My arms are above my head and slightly arched to my side. Right below my neck where my body starts is in the PET scan machine. And my legs are on the other side of the machine with a pillow under my knees to make me more comfortable. The table I am laying on is just that, a table. A small, thin pad (much like the one I was laying on in the ER) is under me. A couple small pillows are under my head barely lifting my head off the table. I have an IV sticking in my right armfold , (hey, this nurse actually found the vein the other one couldn't), I have no shirt on, and its freezing cold in the room for some reason. They give me a blanket to lie over my chest and tell me not to move my chest any because they're using the PET scan. I figured it would be like an x-ray and instant. No, not the case. I have to lie under this thing the whole time. So they have a radio on, and they're listening to some station playing bad 80's and 90's pop shit. The nurses go in the other room because of the radiation, so I have no one to talk to. So I'm laying there staring at the ceiling and listening to this horrid pop songs thinking about nothing. A few minutes go by...then a few more minutes go by...and a few more minutes go by. Its about this time that I realize that I am going to be laying like this for the whole hour! I'm not allowed to put my arms down or move my body, so inevitably, of course, my hands and feet start falling asleep. I'm getting dizzy because my head isn't elevated above my neck and the blood is pooling in my brain. And for some reason I was thinking that they had already turned on the drug because I could feel cold in my arm. I was already ready to get the fuck up and be done with it. Then the nurse comes in and tells me that they would be starting the drug in about 15 minutes. At this point I had already been laying there a good half-hour, lying still with numb hands and feet trying not to squirm. Not exactly the thing I wanted to hear.
7
Papa Jerf!